"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
