Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
pop tarts are not kleenex
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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