wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
