I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
