Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
from now on my penis is your penis
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
