He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
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