just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
