hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
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