The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
