she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
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