Pappa wants mamma naked
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Randomize
