I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
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