I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Randomize
