): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
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