How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize