North Korea, Best Korea!
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Im part way to drunk.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Randomize
