did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
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