Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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