It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
