We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
