I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
Randomize
