No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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