are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
