Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
