Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Randomize