Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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