Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
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