can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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