did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Semen is not good for contacts.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
