but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
