Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize