Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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