Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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