Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
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I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
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I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.