hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
