You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
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