apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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