if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I think I sprained my soul last night
The chlamydia really affected his face.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Randomize
