I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
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