Banned from zoo.
Again?
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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