dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.