why didn't you poke me back
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
The ass gains better be worth it
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize