My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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