you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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