how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
