my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize