It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Randomize
