i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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