Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Where are you?
In a non slutty way
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Randomize
