Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Randomize
