the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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